We first discussed this experiment around the three hungers, small, medium and big. I shared my observations and conclusion: before it’s time it’s too early but when the moment is passed, it’s passed. Answer from the doc: “we suspected that the medium hunger was the best, the important part is to now have the proof”
Afterwards we talked about the breathing question, and then, I admitted that if my body and I we start to be on the same wavelength with hunger, especially the right one, the one that makes you eat with pleasure but without stuffing yourself, on the other hand the “mindfulness” moments as he calls them, meh.
Basically, I couldn’t find the time. Unless I was lacking willpower. In fact, anyway, I must have done the exercise maximum twice without really feeling any benefit.
“It’s fine”, doctor Z reassured me, “You must know that mindfulness is the most difficult. It will take time for you to get there”
This is what I appreciate the most with this doctor. There are no reproach, no goals to reach, no weight control at each appointment. I was so used to remonstrance or reward sessions (in my opinion it’s the same actually) with previous nutritionists that I can’t get over the fact that I’m not in a perpetual exam taking mode anymore. It’s not about progression or successfully overcoming each stage otherwise you put on weight again immediately. And it’s, in my opinion, the central point of this therapy. No figure to reach, no slimness promises, no speech on willpower or control, not forbidden food, no more or less 60 grams of bread per day. No red or yellow points, no nutrition lessons nor theories on proteins which make you lose fat but gain muscle.
Back to our subject.
So, for the breathing, I’ll have to persevere. Actually, we’ll put it aside to focus on a similar exercise which is savoring. To explain it to me the doctor asked me to close my eyes and relax. Then he put in my hand a small foodstuff of which I could appreciate the touch, then the sound it made when I rolled it in my hand, then the smell. Afterwards I could bring what proved to be a raisin to my mouth, roll it around my tongue and finally cut it with my teeth, extract its pulp to end up chewing and swallowing it.
All this without opening my eyes and trying to concentrate only on my olfactory, auditive and gustatory sensations.
“So, what happened?” asked doctor Z once the tiny raisin was eaten.
What happened? I wouldn’t really be able to explain it, an explosion of taste in my month which I couldn’t have felt if I hadn’t been so focused on it. The impression of having eaten more than only one raisin. The pleasure of pulp acidity on my taste buds.
That’s it, for the next two weeks the watchword is try to start each meal with three minutes of minduflness. It can be also during coffee, pay attention to the cup’s temperature, the drink’s exhalation, the warmth of the first sip. Let me tell you it’s not that easy. But for sure it saves you from rushing to food and triggers a process of salivation and savoring.
Otherwise, except this, I mentioned my difficulty to identify satiety, my tendency to stop ‘because I must’ rather than because I’m not hungry anymore. He confirmed that ‘because I must’ is no good because of control which is not perennial. But for now it’s fine too, we are not there yet, we haven’t started the work on emotions, everything in its own time. I’ve also asked if skipping diner after a big business lunch was a good or a bad thing. He answered that eating must be seeing like charging your phone. “Does charging your phone when its battery is not empty come to your mind? No. You usually wait for the indicator to blink. Your indicator is hunger. If don’t feel any symptoms, you don’t need to eat. Duly noted.”
That’s all for now.